Best Man Speeches – How to give your very ‘best’

So a very special person in your life – perhaps a brother, a best friend or a close relative – is about to get married; and he has chosen you to stand by his side in the role of best man.

Way cool, right?!  You get to dress up in a fly tux worthy of James Bond, host the ultimate rockin’ bachelor party, eat obnoxious amounts of cake, and dance with that lovely maid of honor at the wedding reception.  Just as important—perhaps even more so – you will be helping to honor a dear friend on the most important day of his life.  This is sure to be a wonderful experience; one that you and your good buddy will share and remember for a long time to come.

Ah but wait; along with a whole host of pleasure, benefits, and very sweet memories, your appointed position comes with a vast variety of best man duties.  You, after all, will be his chief assistant and supporter on what is sure to be a long and sometimes challenging day; thus, along with all of the honors and benefits associated with this task, you will bear your fair share of responsibilities as well.These are the things that you must do in order to make sure that his wedding day goes as smoothly and seamlessly as possible.

And, though we truly do hate to tell you this, the first and foremost of these duties will involve the delivery of a best man speech.  That’s right Dude; you have to get up in front of friends, family members, that cute maid of honor, and your dear friend the groom and express all your innermost feelings regarding that friend; and you must articulately and eloquently convey your fondest wishes for the future happiness of your friend and his beautiful bride.

It is your chief duty to deliver the best, most articulate and most heartfelt speech possible; while still being concise, down to earth, humorous, and stately in your demeanor.  And for gawd’s sake don’t get too mushy; the groom will rib and mock you eternally if you try to wax poetic about what a radiant and comfy patchwork quilt of a life he is sure to share with his goddess the bride—this, after all, is probably the same guy that you engaged in heated back yard football matches and drank shots with at the local tavern.

The best man speech is one of the most important and anticipated parts of any wedding ceremony.  As the person who is considered closest to the groom—except, of course, for the bride and his parents – everyone will be waiting to hear your fondly spoken wishes for him and his new wife.  Furthermore, they will expect to derive some keen insight from your speech, revealing the true personality and innermost character of your friend the groom.  Therefore, on the day that you are wearing that superior James Bond style tux, you are bound to have a great deal riding on your exquisitely fashionable shoulders.

OK, at this point you may very well be ready to leave the country, to abdicate your best man honors to the groom’s fourth cousin Rodney, or to fake a case of severe laryngitis that will magically appear just before the wedding, and disappear just as surely just in time to wish the couple “Bon Voyage!” on their honeymoon.

After all, you in all likelihood are not a professional orator; and if you are like most people currently existing on the planet earth, you probably would prefer a prolonged and intensive root canal (sans anasesthetic, yet) to making a speech in public.

And here’s an additional consideration particularly important to young males:  You, a real man’s man who may not like to express your emotions—unless, of course, it is in the form of a high five, a handshake or a well-coordinated chest bump; and that last one would be performed only in the wake of a major sports victory or a scored and planned date with a supermodel.  And the last thing you want to do is get all mushy and gushy about your best guy pal, and within easy earshot of friends and family members.  So that just gives you additional initiative to head for the hills on the day of the big event.

Now just wait a minute here; contrary to what you may be thinking at this point, preparing and delivering the ideal best man speech is not as difficult as it may seem.  Yet instead of just waiting until the day of the wedding and saying whatever comes to mind (seldom a wise idea), develop a multi-faceted strategy that will help you prepare and deliver the ‘best’ best man speeches.

First take a good look at some best man speech examples that are available online; but only those available through established and reputable resources.  Seek out those examples that are strongly constructed and articulate but not too general; people can usually tell when a speech is canned or impersonal.  You want to choose an example that will inspire you, and that allows you plenty of room to personalize the oratory to fit your own needs.  You do not need an example that you can read word for word out loud, in a robotic and mechanical fashion, but rather one that will inspire you to deliver your ‘personal best’ in terms of speeches.

Hopefully these examples will allow you to come up with some inspired best man speech ideas.  These could include the integration of personal anecdotes into your narrative; stories and memories that capture the essence of your friendship with the groom.  Did the two of you have a funny first meeting at summer camp; or were you having a particularly festive evening at a night club when suddenly your friend met the bride and sparks proverbially flew?  These are the things that people want to hear; particularly if you deliver your words in a manner that is both casual and sincere, humorous and heartwarming.  And of course, they also will want you to convey your warm wishes and best constructive advice for the bride and groom.

Once you have decided exactly what you want to say in the context of your best man speech, then you will want to set up a structured and organized best man speech structure.  For just as a set of ingredients must be mixed in just the right way to produce a tasty cake, your words, ideas and anecdotes must be presented in just the right formation in order to produce a winning speech.

For example; you want to lead off your speech with a strong kicker—this could be a funny or startling (though not in any way offensive) anecdote involving you and the groom; or, perhaps, the bride and the groom.  Then pay tribute to the bride and groom through additional stories and kind words, and offer them solid but nonjudgmental advice for the future.  Then finish your speech with a message of congratulations and sincere good wishes; one that is sure to warm the hearts of every listener.

Not every best man speech, of course, will be structured in exactly the same manner.  And you do not even have to follow your structure to the letter while delivering your speech; just use it as a general outline through which you can organize your thoughts and ideas.

Once you have established the content and structure of your speech, then you may want to write or type out a best man speech template; one that you may want to have in front of you as you deliver your speech.  Be sure to rehearse your speech well beforehand, though, so it does not appear that you are simply reading from cue cards at the event.  The template is not a literal script, in specific terms, but a road map and general guide that will lead you on your way to deliver a successful best man speech.

Above all, please know that you are not alone in preparing and delivering the oratory of a lifetime: the much anticipated best man speech.  For while no one can tell you what you feel for the very special person who named you best man (and considering that he is probably a close friend or relative anyway, no one has to tell you your own feelings), you may just need a bit of advice in how to organize, formulate and present those feelings in the form of an articulate and comprehensive speech that still manages to tug at the heart strings and tickle the funny bone.

For some practical, informative and sharply written suggestions on how to give the best best man speech, one that will wow the crowd and further endear you to the friend or relative who gave you this exalted title, then please visit On the occasion of a very special wedding day, give ‘em your best!


Please enter your comment!
Please enter your name here